I’ve been absent throughout the month of February and for that I apologise 💕 but I’m back now, and have no plans to go anywhere in the near future.
Except maybe on a plane somewhere warm & sunny…. but in which case, you get to come too!
Anyway, as the seasons are starting to change, and we begin to emerge from the darkness of winter, I thought I might devote some time to that age-old process of ‘spring cleaning’.
Springtime is on the way (yay) and this time of year in particular often inspires us to declutter our homes, but it’s also a good time to consider cleaning out our mental and emotional spaces – our thoughts and feelings.
Just as it feels good to walk into a clean & tidy home, or enjoy a freshly organised space, a mental spring-clean can provide a real boost, as well as a sense of relief and accomplishment.
I’ve put together a checklist to help get you started:
💖 Tell Your Truth
A willingness to be emotionally honest with those we love can deepen our connections and allow our loved ones to offer support and encouragement to us. If you are afraid that being more emotionally honest in your relationships will hurt them, think again. Not sharing your truth for long periods of time leads to emotional build up that eventually erupts, causing further breakdowns in communication and relationship break-ups. The emotional eruption does far more damage to relationships than speaking your truth all along the way.
Ask yourself: When someone asks me how I’m doing, do I say that “I’m fine” even when I’m not?
If you feel unsettled about something you’ve said or done to another person, offer a sincere apology to clear the air.
Even if the hurt was unintentional on your part, a generous and heartfelt apology can remove unnecessary discomfort inside of you and repair damaged connections with others.
Ask yourself: Is there someone in my life that, when I see them, I feel awkwardness about something I’ve said or done? Am I willing to apologize for my part in the miscommunication or hurt feelings?
💖 Give Up a Grudge
Releasing your grip on a lingering grudge can free up emotional energy that you may then invest in other, more positive areas of your life.
I’ve often heard it said that holding onto resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. While having a range of emotions, including anger and hurt, is normal, letting those feelings take up permanent residence in your heart ultimately hurts you.
Ask yourself: Am I holding on to past hurt that I’d be willing to let go of?
Understand – ‘holding on’ to the resentment is a choice. As is letting go.
💖 Awareness is the first step to change
Start to notice your thoughts & beliefs. Identify those which may no longer be serving you – or which might actually be holding you back from living your best life. Once you become aware of them, you can start to assess whether they are helping or hurting you in achieving all that you desire. If they are not helping, then it is time to replace them. Find some new positive thoughts that will support you and move you towards your goals.
You can change the soundtrack to your life. Become more aware of your thoughts and try replacing any negative thoughts with more positive ones. If you constantly play a backing track entitled “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not smart enough” or “I’m not lovable” – try changing it up.
How about something like “I am growing in confidence each and every day”
What you think you become. So, start to pay more attention to your thoughts and take control of what’s on your mind.
💖 Forgive your Faults
When you leave the house and realise you left your purse inside, do you patronise yourself and observe how ‘stupid’ you are? Well if you do, it’s time to stop. Become aware of even the smallest such incident. Use more positive and encouraging language – even when speaking to yourself. In fact, especially when speaking to yourself.
Often, it is easier to overlook other’s faults than it is to let go of your own shortcomings. Over time it’s easy to collect evidence for negative self-beliefs like, “I am never good enough” or “I’m always putting my foot in my mouth” or “See! I’m no good at relationships.” Dwelling on your past mistakes clutters the present and leads to self-critical thoughts and feelings.
How freeing it is to acknowledge that we all make mistakes and that none of us are perfect. It’s OK to learn from personal experience and still maintain a sense of self-acceptance.
Ask yourself: Is there something that I’ve said or done, or a trait that I don’t like about myself that seems to clutter my mind?
💖 Cultivate Quiet Time
Plan some ‘alone time’ to take an internal inventory and identify what has been cluttering your heart and mind.
Take a planned break from technology and spend time visualising how you want to feel in your life and in your relationships.
Ask yourself: What can I clear out of my heart or mind that will allow me to become more calm and centred?
My favourite. Putting pen to paper and identifying your thoughts and feelings helps clear out emotional space, make things seem more manageable and may even help to give you a different perspective. You may not realize how cluttered your mind has become until you start articulating how you feel.
Next time you feel emotionally burdened write it down.
Ask yourself: What am I thinking about right now? What am I feeling right now? Where do I experience that feeling in my body?
Next time, we will talk about the benefits of a more physical de-clutter. But until then, I encourage you to get your journal out and start writing.
x Until next time, sending you love x
I would love to get to know you more, connect with me here.