This morning as I sit down to write, I am hearing the news that our Prime minister Boris Johnson is in intensive care – fighting his own personal battle with Corona-virus.
These surely are unprecedented times and if this news teaches us anything, it is that Covid-19 does not discriminate. EVERYONE is at risk. So please, wherever you are in the world – do take good care of yourselves and respect the guidelines that have been shared in order to stay safe.
Let’s hope our PM is on the mend soon.
And now – back to the task in hand.
Yesterday, I shared a post on social media. If I’m totally honest with you, I’m struggling to know what to post right now, so it was just something to share in order to maintain visibility during these challenging times. I didn’t think too much about it.
But I’ve been guided back to my post this morning, and I believe it contains an important message, truly worth sharing. It resonates powerfully with me and I’m sure it will with you too.
In the words of BRENÉ BROWN.
“Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all of the things you needed to feel worthy of love and belonging, but you’re still searching and your more lost than ever.
Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You can’t live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through you. You were made to live and love with your whole heart.
It’s time to show up and be seen.”
Read it again. Its powerful – right?
The first sentence – Your armor (armour in the UK!) is preventing you from growing into your gifts. This resonates so powerfully. For I am guilty of self-preservation in this way. I have always maintained a powerful suit of armour to protect me from the outside world. People, emotions, and anything that could possibly be deemed a ‘threat’.
But in locking out the ‘bad’ stuff, I have also locked out lots of ‘good’ stuff. And that’s not so clever. I wonder if you might also be guilty of this?
In recent years, I have been intentionally seeking to remove some of those layers – the masks and protective armour that have served as a barrier between my heart and the outside world.
Its enlightening and its terrifying and it often leaves me feeling very vulnerable.
You see, being fully connected to my truth is not something that I have been used to. Without understanding that I was even doing it, I continually stuffed my feelings deep down inside of me.
I grew up in a home where any display of emotion resulted in endless teasing and mocking. And no-one wants to be a ‘softie’ growing up in the outskirts of Glasgow. So I learned not to show feelings. In fact, I learned (or so I thought) not even to have them.
And because I then put so much emphasis on my career, there was no time in my life for ‘introspection’. When feelings did come up that made me feel uncomfortable, then I would ignore them or assume them to be ‘hunger’ and ‘self-medicate’ with chocolate, crisps or takeaway foods. There was very little in my life that couldn’t be solved by a Chinese takeaway.
But of course, what I have come to realise through my work now is that even my ‘workaholic’ tendencies were about staying ‘safe’ and staying ‘in control’. If I worked day and night, then again, there would be no time for introspection. No time to listen to the whispers of my intuition or to navigate what I was really feeling. If I felt ‘out of kilter’ I could numb the pain by indulging in bad foods (as described above) or by treating myself in the Duty-Free shopping area whilst on a work trip. But do you know what… it didn’t make the feelings go away. I was treating the problem at the ‘surface’ level. It merely ‘hid them away’ until the day would come when I was ready to face them.
I am continually encouraging my Clients to step outside of their comfort zones and I must be honest with you……. Being ‘vulnerable’ is just about as uncomfortable as it gets for me. But I will continue on this path. Seeking to deconstruct the persona and connect to the truth of me. I cannot wait to experience the magic on the other side.
As Brené says, we were made to live and love with our WHOLE heart.
So, let me ask you this. Are you connected to YOU – the truth of who you really are at your core? Do you make time for you? Do you sit quietly with your thoughts and acknowledge your feelings (good or bad)?
Are you self-medicating in any way? It could be with chocolate, wine, junk foods, junk tv, drama, prolific dating – any of those things. If you are, I’d like to suggest that you take a look at what might really me going on for you and see if there is another way to work through your fears. Perhaps journaling or meditation for starters.
If you want to go deep, and need some support on the journey, then I am here for you.
It may not be the easiest path, you too may realise some things about yourself that will surprise you. But if you are ready to take charge of your life, then you may first have to ride out the storm.
I’m prepared to embark on that journey with you.
This is your time to shine.
x Until next time, sending you love x
I would love to get to know you more, connect with me here.