I hadn’t long since returned to Scotland after my first 10-year stretch living and working in London when I signed up to participate in a motivational event in Glasgow called Mindstore for Life. At the Event, hosted by Motivational guru Jack Black, attendees were taught many techniques & strategies to improve mindset, ‘programme outcomes’ and plan for a much brighter future.
One of the tools introduced at the time was the ‘bell jar’.
Feeling threatened? Feeling uncomfortable about a meeting, situation of potential confrontation?
Before entering the ‘situation’, step inside an imaginary bell jar. In here you are safe from all forms of attack, criticism or judgement directed your way. You can still hear what is being said, but those harsh words just bounce of the glass and are returned to sender.
You don’t ‘take them on’. They can’t hurt you.
Powerful – right? If you feel so inclined, you can even switch the imaginary bell jar for an imaginary shield and ‘return’ the bullets that are fired your way. Without a single word even being spoken. It’s a wonderful technique of ‘self-preservation’.
I’m curious. Have you ever used any kind of techniques such as this?
I did, and it served me well for many years.
But there is something I would like to share with you today and I think it’s quite important.
If you habitually use any kind of technique such as this, it is essential that as well as stepping inside the bell jar, that you remember to step back outside immediately after the situation where you felt the need to protect yourself.
If you don’t step back out, then it may become a part of you.
You will remain inside after leaving the difficult meeting.
You will remain inside when you reach home.
And whilst this technique may serve you well in blocking out the ‘bad’ or difficult stuff, know this – it is ALSO blocking the good stuff.
With that imaginary glass jar between you and your family and friends, even strangers, you will miss out of the kindness, generosity, love & compassion of others, because YOU are experiencing the world through this protective glass jar.
Before you realise, it will have become part of you and you will struggle to hold down any true, meaningful relationships. How could you? There’s an imaginary glass jar creating a barrier between you and everyone else.
Maybe now is a good time to think about removing it?
Whether it’s a jar, a shield, or a layering of masks, a coat of many colours… whatever it is. I appreciate it may have served you in your 20s – but you don’t need it now. Claim your life back whilst you still have time.
I’ve said this before, but it seems apt right now… You are NOT too old – and it is never too late.
Remove that bell jar and let love back into your life.
x Until next time, sending you love x
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